Dogs- Shouldn’t
this so-called pet become a thing of the past?
Because there
is no other way to say this, I’ll just say it directly- the dog needs to go
away as a pet.
These things
have become as worthless as the day is long. And it isn’t the dog’s fault. It
amazes me beyond comprehension how so many people in the world today still
harbor such an enormous amount of ignorance when it comes to the dogs in our
world. The simple fact of the matter is that the dog is a man-made creature. It
has been brought to be through centuries of haphazard inbreeding in order to
create some eventual animal specifically designed for a specific purpose. Perhaps
this seemed like a good idea at one point in time, but that time has passed.
It seems like
so many people are hard-wired into thinking that the dog has to be a part of
life, but this ruse came about in much the same way that certain foods are most
appropriate for breakfast. At one point in time in the scheme of things,
someone came up with a grand idea on how to increase the sales of eggs and
bacon, and someone else saw a capitalistic opportunity to make it big on
selling dogs. Perhaps this was awesome long ago. There was surely a time when
the dachshund made sense to somebody as an effective hunting dog for hole-dwelling
prey. Today, they're just an object of ridicule.
All breeds were
created for some purpose. The Pit Bull was intentionally created to be a
maniacal monster that would tear apart its own kind on command (which is why
today’s geniuses just love to drop these things into the midst of their children)
only for the amusement of pathetic cowards. Anyone who continues with the
attitude that Pit Bull fighting is an aspect of culture needs to be castrated,
by a Pit Bull. The Retrievers were designed to retrieve fallen prey, which were
mainly birds such as ducks, but today so few are for this purpose and most just occupy the end of a chain. Many little breeds were designed to be companion
animals, which makes one wonder how the Chihuahua ended up being such a
miserable little monster.
The major
problem is that dogs were created through severe and long-term inbreeding
processes, and this continues to this very day. But the obvious issue that
somehow ended up being the big gorilla in the room is that the human population
(also severely inbred, it seems) has expanded to several times from what it was
when the dog came on the scene of popularity. Thus, the continual inbreeding of
dogs has continued to the point that the gene pool of the canine of today is
about as shallow as a puddle.
I feel fine in
stating that the Veterinary Industry of today should feel great shame for its
role in aggravating what is an abominable practice. There is almost no breed of
dog in existence today that is not a pure abomination of grand proportion.
Every dog breed suffers immensely through a myriad of horrible afflictions attributed
specifically to the problem of inbreeding. Some of these afflictions are
relatively minor and can be treated, but others are so horrifying (such as
insanity) that their proliferation is nothing less than evil. While the British
Bulldog might seem endearing in its freakish nature, these poor things are born
only through artificial means (they must be born via C-Section in order to not
kill the mother because of their huge heads) and then must endure a lifetime of horrible afflictions that
require constant treatment, and then still the things die much earlier than
their counterparts because of the aggravated problem.
Poodles go deaf
and crazy, so many breeds develop hip and skeletal issues that maim them early
in life, and numerous breeds suffer skin afflictions so severe that modern
veterinary medicine scrambles just to ease the torture. Furthermore, we have
created monstrous issues by creating the perfect conditions to widely breed fleas
and ticks, making them stronger and more resilient than ever before, thus
creating an evil plague afflicting other species that were perfectly fine
without humanity’s help.
How does it
make sense to have every single county in the United States, let alone the rest
of the world, harboring an uncountable number of abandoned animals who are
entirely unwanted by anyone in a location that is an easy stroll from where one
can buy just about any dog or puppy on demand? These no-kill shelters act as
though they’re being humane by not putting these animals down (mercifully), but
would rather crowd them into conditions so horrifying that those dogs not going
crazy because of their barbaric inbreeding go crazy via the vulgar lives they
must endure. Just look at the conditions of any so-called shelter and you’ll
find a place of horror. These poor animals are kept in cages so small and they
might have so much as some cushioning with some dirty blanket. They’re forced
to endure their own filth at least a good portion of the day before some lackey
comes along to minimize the mess. But yet it would be madness to stop this
misery.
More and more
people today are finding themselves living in conditions where they are no
longer allowed to have a pet. The average apartment might allow room for some
severely inbred Pug or Miniature Pinscher, but yet so many of these inbreeds
want to fill these places with an overgrown and menacing Pit Bull, directly
because they know the dog is a coward’s monster only good for attacking old
ladies and little children.
I am endlessly
appalled by these liberal suckasses who stick up for the Pit Bull with the
attitude of, “Don’t judge the breed, but the breeder, or the owner. Give them a
loving home and they’ll be wonderful.”
Morons.
For those who
have been residing on this planet for any length of time, I have a question.
When one hears of a dog attack on the news, is the breed of the dog often in
question? Do we continually hear of Pomeranians going mad and attacking a
schoolyard full of Kindergartners? Do we hear of some Pug losing control and
ripping the arm off some screeching senior citizen who was simply checking
their mail? No, the breed in question is almost always the Pit Bull, and that
is exactly why the breed is so popular to have as a pet or (I might be sick) a
guard dog. What good is a so-called guard dog that attacks a toddler for no
good reason? What are you inbreeds guarding, your VHS collection of Barney
episodes? The home movies of all your uncles running a chain on you?
There has been
exactly zero success in dealing with pet overpopulation despite the numerous
efforts placed by well-meaning people. Veterinarians spay and neuter for small
costs, but still most people won’t even entertain the option. This is
particularly true with the so-called purebred dog (meaning the inbreeding is
peaked) because the abominable freak has papers and therefore the freaks it
spawns might be worth money. A Cabbage Patch doll has papers, asshole; go get
one of those.
Your charming, effervescent
author once adored the dogs of the world. When I was a boy, I had a retriever
mix-breed I loved dearly. I looked forward to the time he and I spent together
and even my friends thought of him as one of the guys. But after a few short
years I reached adulthood and left home to pursue what this world had left to
offer, and I had to leave this friend behind. Eventually, someone there found the dog dead in a snow bank. So much for caring for that nonhuman member
of the family.
Some years
later, I adopted a greyhound from one of the local racetracks (racing
greyhounds- a very good reason why aliens from other planets won’t have
anything to do with us). While I cared about the dog and the entire family
indulged his peculiar ways with love and patience, this abominable sub-breed is
such a wreck that the issue of racing these animals for momentary amusement is
part of the definition of evil. I would go into the issue of the problem, but
there’s nothing I could pass on that would be anything new and the popularity
of this barbaric practice only continues to grow.
Just so you
know, I don’t have a specific issue with the racing itself (other than the
existence of dogs) because the things just love to run. I mean, they love to
run. But the conditions these poor dogs endure specifically because humanity
couldn't give a flying fuck are beyond the realm of normal evil. Sure, you have
people stepping in to help, but they only aggravate the issue through alleviating
the inconveniences suffered by those running the industry. If legislation came
down stating that all racing dogs must have a home equal to the most pampered
of pets and that they were afforded the benefits of any other professional athlete,
I would be quieter in my rants. But because they are actually treated as the
very lowest of the low in the dog world, the whole issue is pure evil. Hey, how
do they create an inbreeding issue that leads to a phobia of stairs? That’s
just meaner than mean, if you ask me. The Pug, as stupid as it is, is more than
happy to tumble down any flight of stairs and find its feet with that perpetual
smile on its knobby head. But greyhounds endure an evil world full of
staircases that inspire terror in their hearts.
I cannot say
for certain humanity would not miss what they like about dogs should all dogs
go away, but the dogs would be better off. Perhaps Paris Hilton’s dog has it
okay, but most dogs endure a life of misery via being of a species viciously polluted
by humanity. Most dogs, should they not be born a commodity brought to be by
what’s called a reputable breeder (there’s an oxymoron for you) are born
literally worth less than zero, yet their being born is a condition proven
unstoppable.
Just wander
into any grocery store and consider what the fuck we feed these things. The foods
available to the dog are widely considered a slow poison for dogs and are
banned from consumption by anything else or anyone. Should a wayward child be
discovered eating this shit and people go into a panic, assured the child might
die any moment. For any of you who read this far, make an honest effort to look
into the making of the average dog food and then come back to me with the
slightest complaint of this blog post. I have every confidence to stand by my
assertion that everything ‘dog’ is just wrong.
For you who
support the way things are or have some practical idea on how to improve the
situation, please step forward. But I close this post here, confident that I am
right on this issue despite the whimpering. Oh, and Dogs is my all-time favorite Pink Floyd song.